The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Randomize
