So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Randomize
