woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
