He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
