Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
We were destined to go to rehab together
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize
