Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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