last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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