I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize