And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
