is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
