in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
