um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
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I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
This is my gift to your gina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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