The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
