In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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