oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
