I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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