So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
