I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
