I have demons in me.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
