i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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