My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
