I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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