From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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