Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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