Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
