Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
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