he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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