i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
