Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
