i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I could make wine with my vomit
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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