How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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