at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
