Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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