eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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