Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I currently don't understand fingers.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
