So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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