She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
