He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize