We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
