Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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