It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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