you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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