He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
