Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I have feelings that need drinking.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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