Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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