I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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