Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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