tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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