At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
you would pick up someone in the library
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
