i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
