at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize